A FLY ON THE WALL

Ever wished you could be a fly on the wall, so that you could keep watch over your teens’ safety, without intruding into their space or being accused of “stalking” or “cramping their style”?

Although, I would admit to have given my own parents a hard time while growing up in the 80’s – I think parents today are up against a lot more with caring for their children. Aside from the usual hormonal changes contributing to teenage angst and moods, these days we compete against a whole array of social media and the very accessible mobile devices that are seemingly glued to our children’s palms nearly all day and night!

Yes, parents hope to provide the best advice to guide and equip children to cope on their own when they are in the real world. Many a times, children (and adults alike) reveal and express way too much of themselves on social networking, for their own good – becoming vulnerable and falling “prey” to dangers around them. This is a very real concern for parents, especially when such information can get out there just within seconds after “posting” it and for some parents who are sometimes “blocked” from their children’s social network, will then be oblivious to what is being posted or messaged to all their “virtual” friends and strangers alike.

In my youth I frequently found myself telling my mother to be assured that I knew how to stay safe and would remember all that she had taught me. At times, when peeved over her parenting, would ask, “Have more faith in yourself that you’ve taught me well. Don’t you trust your own upbringing of your children?”

But having said that, I recall an incident in the 80’s that could have gone seriously wrong if not for the grace and protection from God. I was on a back-packers holiday to India / Kathmandu with my then spouse-to-be. We needed to change more local currency and asked the nice tuk-tuk driver to help arrange that. He then drove us to a busy marketplace and the two guys shot-off on foot, leaving me alone in the open vehicle in the middle of a dense market crowd. When I had lost sight of them, I began to realise that it was very risky and naive to have done that. Having no means of communication, no mobile phones, not knowing where I was, the worst thoughts crept into my mind. But alas, I was relieved when they both reappeared after about fifteen minutes later.

As parents, we can’t help wanting to protect our children and keeping them always in our sight, but naturally teens will want to start spreading their wings and make it on their own. So perhaps sharing our own “risky” experiences with our children will help them relate better and not seem like we were poking into their affairs. It does also make it more meaningful when we help interpret the realities of dangers to our children and not just dishing out the monotonous TO-DO or NOT-DO List.

Then what is left for us after, is to be diligently praying parents and call upon our God to be that “fly on the wall” watching over our children?